The Perfect Match

The Perfect Match: Why Real Love Isn’t a Reality TV Show (But It’s Still Pretty Great)

Let’s be honest: we’ve all binge-watched a dating show and thought, *“Could I ever find a connection that… dramatic?”* Swipeable apps, viral “how we met” TikToks, and Netflix’s *Perfect Match* (you know, the one where Love Is Blind’s Shayne cries in a hot tub?) make romance feel like a competitive sport. But here’s the thing: real-life love isn’t about rose ceremonies or algorithmically-approved “matches.” It’s messier, quieter, and way more interesting. Let’s talk about why chasing the “perfect match” is overrated—and what actually matters.  

What Even *Is* a “Perfect Match”? Spoiler: It’s Not a Person

When I hear “perfect match,” I picture two puzzle pieces snapping together flawlessly. But humans aren’t puzzles—we’re more like those abstract art paintings that look chaotic up close but make sense when you step back.  

Reality TV sells us the fantasy of instant, effortless chemistry. *Perfect Match* throws gorgeous people into villas, adds alcohol, and edits the chaos into a “love story.” But real relationships aren’t built in three weeks between jet ski dates. They’re built in grocery store aisles, during 2 a.m. insomnia talks, and while arguing over whose turn it is to unload the dishwasher.  

Why We’re Obsessed with TV Romance (And Why It’s Problematic)

Let’s admit it: watching Zari from Maisha Magic stir drama. But these shows are designed to *entertain*, not educate. They thrive on conflict, miscommunication, and cliffhangers—the exact things that tank real relationships.  

The danger? We start comparing our love lives to the highlight reel. We wonder why our partner doesn’t serenade us on a balcony (or why we’re not dating a six-pack-ab influencer). But here’s the secret: *no one’s relationship looks like TV*, not even the contestants’. After the cameras leave, they face the same awkward texts and mismatched socks as the rest of us.  

How to Find Your “Good Enough” Match (Because Perfect Doesn’t Exist)

My friend Wakio married her “perfect match” last year. He’s kind, hilarious, and… leaves toothpaste globs in the sink daily. She calls him her “90% match”—because the other 10% is compromise, eye-rolls, and learning to love his weird obsession with collecting vintage lunchboxes.  

Here’s what actually works when building a lasting connection:  

1. Date yourself first. Know your non-negotiators (mine: must laugh at my puns, must not vote for dictators).  

2. Embrace the “slow burn”. Chemistry fizzles; trust, respect, and shared values simmer.  

3. Let them be human. My partner forgets birthdays but remembers how I take my coffee. That’s the stuff.  

4. Ditch the checklist. That “6’2, lawyer, loves yoga” guy? He might also hate cats and hate *you*.  

Love Isn’t a Trophy—It’s a Team Sport

The healthiest couples I know aren’t “perfect matches.” They’re people who choose each other daily, even when they’re annoyed, bored, or binge-eating tacos in sweatpants. They’ve survived layoffs, bad haircuts, and that one time they accidentally called their mother-in-law by the dog’s name.  

My grandparents were married 62 years. When I asked Grandpa their secret, he said, “We hated each other three days a month. The other 27? We just showed up.”  

The Takeaway: Perfect is Boring Anyway

Next time you’re doom-scrolling dating apps or yelling at Francesca on Netflix, remember: real love isn’t about finding someone who checks every box. It’s about finding someone who’ll sit with you in the quiet, unedited moments—the ones that’ll never make it onto TV.  

So here’s to the “good enough” matches, the slow burns, and the people who love us *because* of our flaws, not in spite of them. Because at the end of the day, the real “perfect match” is the one that lets you be gloriously, messily, unapologetically *you*.  

#Perfect is boring.